Remember Me?
by BellatrixBlackLovett
Summary: When Sir Timothy returns to Candleford he is penniless and without a wife or child. He turns to his childhood lover, Dorcas Lane, but does he love her like he says he does? And who is that stanger, also wanting Dorcas?
1. I'm Home

_**I've really just thought of this. It came to me about 30 minutes ago when I was just watching Larkrise To Candleford :) Dorcas Lane 3**_

_**So, I've always wanted Sir Tim to come back and be with Dorcas like she wished they would be, but I thought that Dorcas's love life never really came to plan (James Dowland - ggrr!) So I added in a bit of a twist. I've always loved that period of time, I wish I was born back then, the corest and dresses :)**_

_**I do hope you enjoy and comment. They are loved!**_

_**To you, if you have felt the pain that Dorcas did.**_

Chapter 1

He looked down the road, his eyes wanding about the place till they settled on the front of the Post Office. How it had changed. The front wasn't that dull brown and the windows went as dark has they used to be, no, it was indeed different. The walls were now painted blue and white, flower pots placed on every inch of the ground, there was now a tree to the left of the Post Office itself. His eyes now wandered to the pretty sign that marked the top of the Post Office. Had it changed for the better?

Rubbing his head he picked up the little bag he carried and walked toward the Post Office, that little hub of the community.

_Oh Dorcas. Oh my little girl. How I need you!_

He let himself through the backdoor, he used to do it so often it seemed second nature. Walking straight into the kitchen he saw a young maid surrounded by water.

''Oh dear, look what I've done! Miss Lane will kill me!'' she muttered to herself not knowing quite what to do. She looked around in search for the mop but instead came facce to face with a handsome stranger ''Oh my!'' she gasped and then bowed low ''Are you ok, Sir?''

Smiling the handsome man placed his bag onto the table that settled in the centre of the little kitchen. He opened a nearby closit and pulled out a well worn mop ''I think you need this'' he said passing her the mop. The young girl took the mop and looked deep into the strangers eyes, they told a dark story.

''I was wondering whether Miss Lane was in?'' Asked the stranger. He pulled out a chair from the table and sat down in it.

''Miss Lane?'' Asked the maid with depp curiosity ''She'd still be in bed, Sir''.

The man smiled ''Well, yes. It is too early for Dorcas'' he turned to the maid ''So, fine missy! What would your name be?''

''Minnie, Sir. I'm Miss Lane's maid'' she looked at the watery mess ''Maybe not her best maid..'' She took up her mop and began to clean up the spills.

''Her maid? Oh, what happened to Zillah?'' The man leaned forward in his chair, not wanting to take his eyes of the little creature. She seemed so unaware of the world, like she was fearful of something, someone. He took in her looks, he wasn't the prettiest girl he had seen. Not like her. No, not at all...

''Zillah, Sir? The old maid. Well - she's dead Sir!'' Minnie muttered feeling the unhappiness, though she had never once met the poor woman ''She has been for sometime''. She placed the mop back into the closit and picked up a small scrubbing brush and began to work on the oven. She was slow at her work, not bothering to cover the whole surface of the oven or the pots and pans still placed on it from last nights supper.

The man rubbed his stubbley chin with his hand ''Dead? Zillah. Well I never..' He was so sure that Zillah would have out lived him, she was never without energy and there was nothing she couldn't do. Miss Lane must have been in such discomfort!

''Excuse me Sir'' asked Minnie poking her fingers into a tin of polish making them turn black and sitcky ''Who are you? If you dont mind me saying Sir! 'Cos Miss Lane hates it when I poke my nose into others buisness and she can shout when she want to Sir!'' she gasped for breath ''Not that I'm saying Miss Lane is a terrible woman, Sir! She is the most wonderfulest person ever!''

He laughed. Lordie this girl did like to speak her mind, and he liked her for it! Miss Lane always had an eye for people. He missed that ''I'm a very old friend of Miss Lane's'' he told the young maid. She moved closer towards him, wanting to know more ''Me and her go years back -''

''How many years Sir?'' asked Minnie smiling

''Oh, nearly all of my life I have know Dorcas!'' he grinned to himself at the memories of them running around as children ''We were childhood friends. And we were tennis parteners!''

Minnie grinned, making her front teeth poke out like rabbit's teeth. ''Miss Lane, tennis?'' The thought of her mistress running around with a racket made her imagination run wild.

''I'll let you know that Dorcas if very good at tennis! But she never liked to loss, she got awfully moody when she didn't win'' he tapped his nose ''Though I did let her win, a few times...'' For the fact, he let her win all the time. He loved to see her smile the way she did, making her eyes wide and her teeth sparkle. ''I remember the first time I saw her with my eyes, the most prettiest woman I'd ever seen! She was picked flowers down one of my father private walkways. I thought I'd be funny to hid in a brush and then when she'd come along I would run onto her! Well it didn't go as well as I'd liked. I jumped on her see, and then she grabbed me and boxer my ears so hard I cried like a baby!''

Minnie gasped ''Miss Lane hurt you, Sir?''

''She was deeply sorry afterwards. But she did like to bring it up from time to time, just to remind me that she could!''

The maid laughed and went back to rubbing at the oven. Her mind wandered away from the rest of the world, imagining Miss Lane beating this handsome stranger that sat in the kitchen. ''Miss Lane should be up soon, Sir!'' she told him.

''Ah, good!'' said the man clapping his hands together ''I'll tell you something else about Dorcas. She was riding past my house one day and she -''

''Timothy?!'' gasped a woman behind him.

He turned to her, she was dressed in a pale blue dress with her hair pulled high on the top off her head, how beautiful she was.

''Dorcas...'' he smiled.

_**Comment please! They make me happy!**_


	2. I Told Her I Still Loved You

_**Disclaimer**_ – _Sadly, I own nothing.___

''You cannot just walk back into my life Timothy! You left Candleford for good.''

''Dorcas please, I had no choice. I have no family anymore! She left me and took the baby with her.''

Sighing Dorcas looked at Timothy, her old friend, before shaking her head and moving to stand "Can't you just talk to Adelaide? There has to be some reason behind all this."

"I told you Dorcas, she won't have me back, she told me to go." Slowly Timothy sat down in a chair, his head cupped deep into his hands before he slowly breathed out. It had been a good year since he'd left Candleford to go and live with his wife whom at the time was pregnant. It wasn't till they'd reached London that he realised how much he'd really missed Dorcas Lane and her witty ways.

"What did you do Timothy?" Dorcas whispered as she sat in the chair next to him. She longed to touch him, her hand wanted to be placed on his knee so much but she couldn't bring herself to do it. Timothy picked his wife over her; he made that clear when he left. "Adelaide is not usually like this, you must have done something."

Lifting his head ever so slightly Timothy looked around Dorcas' small room, the pantry. It looked the same as it done a whole year ago. A small book case in the corner which books from Darwin and other scientists of evolution were kept. Two chairs faced each other whilst a large two seated sofa was to the side of them. A table lay in the middle of the two chairs, on which a pot of tea, two cups and a slice of cake lay on. Cake. He smirked lightly, one of Dorcas' weaknesses.

Dorcas tilted her head, watching his eyes flick around the room before she leant a little closer to him, daring her body on. Even she couldn't lie to herself, no matter how much she pushed him away, no matter how much she told him to get on with his life with Adelaide he always seemed to be back in her company, just how she wanted it. "Timothy, you must of hurt her for her to act in such a way. She wouldn't push you away from your only child." She paused for a little while, how it was she who wanted Timothy's child. Dorcas craved for her own child, that came flooding to her when she took on her cousins daughter, Annie, for a little while and since then she'd wanted nothing more. "How is the young one?"

"Her name is Ellie." Muttered Timothy, catching Dorcas' gaze quickly causing his heart to race before he dropped them once more "She's the prettiest little thing I've ever seen." He smiled gently at the thought before he leant back in the chair "Gummiest smile, tiny little hands and she's taken on her mother's hair, she's just beautiful is every single way."

"She sounds a dream Timothy," smiled Dorcas, her voice as soft and calming as always "you must miss her loads." Slowly her hand reached out and landed on his knee. Suddenly a shiver ran down her back as everything came flooding back. He was hers. He always was.

Timothy's eyes snapped down, flicking gently over her hand, such wonderful hands that told a deep story. Looking back up, his eyes trailing all over her body as he done so, he smiled widely at her "Yes. I do. I just wished I could've had thing differently, changed what I wanted."

A frown swept over Dorcas' face but she was quick to push it away. She didn't really know what he meant but deep down she knew what it wanted to be. Gently she patted his knee before she too sat back into her chair, their small connection breaking. "Maybe you should go back to London. Try it out with her again. I'm sure if you spoke to her and-"

"It's past that Dorcas." snapped Timothy as he cut into her sentence. He knew that she was only trying to do her best, give out that advice he craved so much but he also knew she was trying to push him away, trying to get him out of her life. "I cannot go back; she wants me nowhere near herself or Ellie. It's over."

"You were always stubborn." whispered Dorcas before she laughed lightly seeing Timothy smile up at her. She stood up quickly, holding onto her dress as she looked down to him. "Do you have anywhere to go, Timothy?"

He smiled as he looked down; he'd sort of prayed she'd bring up that question. "No I don't. Maybe I'll ask some of the folk in Larkrise whether they'll let me stay for a few days, I'm sure Emma wouldn't mind."

Shaking her head Dorcas twisted one of the rings on her finger "You'll do no such thing. Emma has got the three children in there and Robert too, she's got no space so there will be no need to bother the poor thing." She twisted her lips a little, she knew she was going to ask him to stay, of course she would but she'd make out once again that it was just her nature of helping her friends out in a time of need "You can stay here. There is a bed in Thomas' old room that'll be more than happy with your company, I'm sure of that." She smirked lightly with a little nod before she went to pour him some tea.

"Thank you very much Dorcas," smiled Timothy, he knew that woman a lot more then she thought "and Thomas, how is he by the way?"

"Oh, married." Dorcas looked up and smiled widely as she watched her Timothy's face, her _friends _face. "Oh yes, with Margret, do you remember her?" Quickly she poured him so fresh tea and gently passed the cup to him. Their hands lightly brushed against each other's, making her shiver once more. How was it she could never get enough of him?

Taking the cup off her Timothy raised his eyebrows "Married? Thomas? Well, I never!" laughing he looked up to Dorcas as she too took a cup of tea and sat back down "And yes, I remember her well, she was a little light headed from what I could remember, the reverends daughter, kind natured though. She and Thomas must be a brilliant match."

"I do agree they seem at sorts with each other." Dorcas sipped lightly at her tea before she put it back down onto the table, her eyes watching the steam that rose from it. "Took Thomas long enough to ask her, even then he needed a little nudge," she winked "but he took on the challenge and here they both are today, such a happy couple."

Smiling to himself Timothy rang his finger around the cup before a large sip. "I see you have a new maid. I rather like her, she's very funny to watch," he paused and smirked "though she's no good with the mop and bucket or even the polish for that matter."

Rolling her eyes Dorcas scoffed lightly "That girl's head is away with the fairies. Sometimes I ask myself my on earth I took her on," she softened her face expression and sighed "but then she'll say something to cheer me up or I'll watch her playing with Sidney and it all changes. She's a wonderful girl."

Timothy smiled for a moment, Dorcas could always see the kind and caring side of everyone, she seemed to get into their heads and pull out their better side. His head snapped up a moment later as her words ran through his head "Sidney?" he asked, a little confused look on his face.

"Yes, Sidney, he's my adopted son. He's just brilliant, smarter than anything I know and he is such a little wonder." Taking another sip of her tea Dorcas smiled lightly, how she did love that little boy so much, he was what she'd always wanted, a child to call her own, but even the it didn't stop the throb of wanting a child that was truly hers.

Dorcas had an adopted son? She herself was a mother now, of some sort? Timothy smiled lightly at her "I should like to meet the chap," he nodded quickly before picking up his cup and standing up to slowly walk around the small room "I see you are pleased to of taken him under your wing, Dorcas."

"But of course. He's taken well to the Post Office and its rather busy ways of life. Everyone in Candleford thinks well of him and I know he'll grow up to be a wonderful man." She smiled her happiness beaming around the whole room as she watched Timothy.

Laughing Timothy looked to her before his eyes flicked out of the window down to the pleasant, busy road of Candleford itself "Well, with Dorcas Lane around anyone is bound to turn out to be a wonderful person, no matter what."

"Oh, Timothy, you talk such nonsense. I believe that there is good in everybody, some are just more scared to show it then others."

"But even you know Dorcas that you have the charm of pulling it out of them."

"Well," she paused for a moment, a small smile on her face "I guess people just need someone talk to and they seem to come to me..not that I mind."

A small chuckle came from Timothy as he took another sip of the tea, his eyes flicking down to a small shop over the road from the Post Office. "I see that the Pratt sisters are still going. I'm to guess they are still as wonderful as always." He raised his eyebrows, a smirk on his face as he looked over to Dorcas who was now stood up and making her way towards him.

"The Miss Pratt's are just as charming as always." muttered Dorcas as she watched the shop from over Timothy's shoulder "They have seemed to calm down a little since you left though, which I think pleased everyone dearly." Her eyes flicked up the road, dotting over the many people who tugged about before they landed on a hotel, The Golden Lion. "Then Mr. Dowland came along and that all changed, once again they were going out of their ways to impress him with any and every means possible," she sighed thinking of James Dowland, how he asked for her hand, how he broke her heart by lying about his past relationships "but now he has left that's all changed."

"Dowland? I haven't heard of him. Who is he?"

"He owned that hotel," said Dorcas trying to not go into too much detail about her old friend, old lover "but he found out that this little town wasn't for him. And some people were hurt by his ways." She bit on her tongue gently feeling a little spite rise up in her body but she was a strong woman, she could get over whatever that man had done to her.

"Strange, usually most people stay in Candleford." Muttered Timothy as his eyes flicked over the Golden Lion's sign. The hotel was grand, yellow in colour with Lion status placed either side of the door. Suddenly a silver glint about it caught his eye "What is that?" he asked leaning closer to the window "That thing above the door."

Gently Dorcas went up onto her tip toes to make sure she could get a better look at the hotel. Her face fell even more when she also saw the silver glint. Slowly she fell back onto the soles of her feet and turned back around to pick up her tea from the table "It is a silver thrupence," she said after a sip of her tea "Mr. Dowland was rather fond of giving them out to the children around Candleford and Larkrise."

A thoughtful sigh left Timothy's mouth before he grabbed the bottom of the window and pushed it upwards till he felt the light Candleford breeze rush over his cheeks and down his neck. He couldn't help but smile, he'd missed this place so much and now that he was back the love for this little town was seeping back into his system and he now found his mind off of his wife and daughter, it was now all on being home in this town, it was now all on Dorcas Lane.

Dorcas' dress of a brilliant dark blue with a white collared top swept along the floor as she made her way over to her priced bookcase before she set her cup down to one side. Her finger's ran over her books as her bright brown eye's drifted over the written titles of each and everyone one of them. Each book had a meaning to her, they showed the truth of the world and how each individual person came to be on this earth. A small grin crept onto her face as she pulled one out before she turned to Timothy "Am I to presume that you are staying in Candleford then?"

Timothy leant forward so his arms were resting against the window ledge and his head was placed outside into the cool air before he nodded "I guess I have to." he said whilst turning his head to catch the sister's Pratt's coming out from their clothes shop. A chuckle left his mouth as he watched Pearl sort out her younger sister's clothing before they both tugged off up the road to the shops, the both of them arguing along the way. Shaking his head in amusement Timothy pulled back from the window before he shut it and went back over to the table in which he also picked up his cup of tea. Quickly he finished drinking, licked his lips and put the empty cup down to settle once again onto the table "I hope that you do not mind my being here Dorcas," he started as he looked her over "I will not worry you for long, I shall find somewhere else to stay maybe that hotel along the road but for now, whilst I find my feet, I'm more then delighted to have Thomas' old room."

"But of course you must stay here as long as you please my friend," cooed Dorcas with a little smile as she ran her finger down the spine of the book she held tightly "you know that you are more than welcome to stay here at any time." She gave him a reassuring nod and a gentle smile "I cannot wait to see the people's faces around here when they see you've returned. There will be alot of questions asked, I'll tell you now and most of them shall be from Pearl and Ruby Pratt, so do brace yourself."

"I have braced myself for nearly my whole life with questions from those two, Miss Lane, but I have a feeling even more shall be asked." Timothy sighed and rubbed his forehead lightly before he shook his head and smiled "Maybe I shall just have to keep to my room, hide in the Post Office that sounds like a plan."

Dorcas laughed ever so gently before she titled her head and watched her friend "Timothy, you must be extremely tired, no doubt you should rest and get your energy back up. Come and get rested, I shall get Minnie to make up your bed. Come along." Ushering him to the door Dorcas led Timothy down the corridor to a small room at the end "Now, I shall bring your bag up later but for now have as much sleep that will creep into your system."

"Dorcas Lane," said Timothy as he opened to bedroom door and stood in the doorway "you are too kind, even to the likes of someone such as me." He looked down before he stood nearer to her and lightly kissed her cheek "You have my deepest gratitude."

The contact of his soft lips against her cheek made Dorcas blush lightly before she looked down and coughed. "I like to help out," she muttered with a small dizzy smile "where ever I can. You know I wouldn't just turn you out, no matter what you've done." After a while she looked back up to him and sighed "What on earth did you ever say to Adelaide to make her turn you out in such a way?" Shaking her head she wished him a pleasant rest before she turned back around and left to make her way down to the Post Office. She couldn't really believe it, her old friend; her old lover was in her house, sleeping in one of her beds. The smile never left her face as she tugged down the stairs, her dress in her hands before she wove around Minnie was almost dropped the wash basket before she went into the shop and leant against the counter. Why was he really back? Why was he here, with her, once again?

Timothy leant against the doorway as he watched her walk away, her hips swaying lightly as she went. He rubbed his head once more as her question ran in his head. Turning around he went into his small room, in which two beds lay before he shut the door behind him. His back slumped against the door as a deep, heavy sigh left his mouth before his head tilted back and tapped lightly against the wood behind him before he let his back slide down it till he sat onto the wooden floor "I told her I still loved you, Dorcas Lane."

_There you have it; I finally completed this chapter :)_

_Talking of Larkrise to Candleford, I'm watching it from my DVD collection – I'm just that cool ;)_

_I do hope you have enjoyed and I shall post the third chapter up ASAP_

_Reviews, as you all know, are deeply loved._

"_**If the Post Office is so drab and displeasing, might I suggest that your guests look the other way?"**_


	3. A Gallop In The Rain

Now, are you sure about this? It looks like the heavens will open on us at any second."

"Oh please, Timothy. You know full well that rain does not bother me in the slightest. Besides I do believe it was you who asked for this so by all means we must get on with it. Don't tell me you're scared of a bit of water."

A soft giggled rang around a little barn in which Timothy and Dorcas Lane stood with two horses at their sides. The air was light and crisp and the smell of sweet hay and horse manure filled each of their noses with a pleasant little tingle. Outside the clouds were rolling across the sky. The little white clouds were soon turning into larger black ones which made the sky look haunting and deadly. With a huff Timothy flung a saddle onto a sandy coloured horse back and tightened up the girth with a few grunts.

"You were always slow at tacking horse's up." teased Dorcas as she ran her gloved hand over her own horse face which was fully tacked and awaiting for his owner to mount its back.

With a small gleaming smile Timothy looked over his horse, patted its flanks and then spoke out. "Dorcas Lane there is no crime in making sure my horse is perfectly tacked up in a way that is proper."

"And who is to say what 'proper' is?"

"Oh...Hush. Now, do you want me to get you up on that horse of yours or shall you be running along beside it?"

Dorcas Lane tapped her chin in pretend thought before she nodded and put her hands onto her hips. "I would love your help, Timothy. I'm afraid to say that my legs cannot carry me as fast as a horses' could and with these boots on I would surly break my neck at such a speed!"

"Then you must agree with me that making sure your horse it proper for riding is no crime at all." Dorcas opened her mouth to protest but Timothy was quickly back to make his point. "Or would you rather let the horse take you for a run?"

With a dramatic roll of her eyes and a snort Dorcas agreed. "Fine, you win! I do agree with you. Is that good enough for you, My Lord?" With a chuckle Dorcas Lane held onto her horse's saddle and put her foot out for him to grip onto. "Get me on this horse then, or I shall have to play unfairly."

"Same old Dorcas Lane." mumbled Timothy as he gave his old flame a leg up onto her perfectly content horse. "Is Lady Dorcas happy now?"

"Much. Thank you, Timothy."

"Good. Now," with a grunt Timothy pulled himself up onto his own horse and gave it a hearty pat on its soft neck, "let's go for a good ride, shall we?"

With that the pair headed out of the little busy town of Candleford into the more open area of Larkrise. It had been some time since the both of them had taken a ride out. In fact, this was the most time they had spent together in what seemed like years. Their horse's hoofs pounded against the soft earth as they raced up a hill. Laughter left Dorcas' mouth as she leant over her horse and urged it on. The whole time Timothy watched her. How wonderful it was to see his old love having such joy out of something they used to do all the time. Like always, even with the tennis, Timothy let Dorcas beat him to the top of the hill; he loved seeing her winning smile afterwards.

"And, once again I win!"

"Yes, yes, Miss Lane, indeed you did. But, that doesn't make you the best horse rider around. That would be me!"

Laughter erupted between the pair again before they stopped to watch a fox creep in the grass not far from them. Its red coat snapped through the golden corn as it searched for a rabbit or small bird to feast on. Then, it was completely silent.

"Dorcas?"

"Hmm?"

"I was wondering, well since I'm back in Candleford now, if I could take you out to lunch?"

He'd been meaning to ask her for some time. Of course he was still in love with her and no doubt she was with him but that didn't chance the fact that he was still married and he did have a daughter. With a soft gulp and a nervous twitch on his reins Timothy waited patiently.

"I.." Dorcas let her gaze wonder from the fox that was now stalking around in the long grass, its tail swishing madly behind its back, to face Timothy with a gentle smile. It was wrong to agree but where was the harm? Yes, Timothy was married to Adelaide but he wasn't with her and she didn't want him. Dorcas Lane always gave into him and she'd do it all again. "I'd love to, Timothy."

_Thank you, to whatever God is out there, thank you! _ "No, I must thank you, Dorcas Lane. If it had not been for you and your kindness I would still be out on the streets or in some ghastly hotel room. You've no idea how wonderful it is to be back in the Post Office, it's like my own little home."

Dorcas blushed at Timothy's kind words before her eyes moved back to the fox which now had a dead rabbit trapped between its powerful jaws. "Now, Timothy. You knew all too well that I'd give you somewhere to sleep and I'm sure that you knew I wouldn't turn you out. There is no need to thank me just because I am practical."

"I do believe that Dorcas Lane must learn that she is alot more then she thinks she is."

"Timothy..." Sighed Dorcas as her gloved hands moved up and down her horses mane as it chopped happily on the bit between its teeth. Suddenly the cloud rumbled, the wind picked up and the sky turned into a horrid deathly grey colour.

"I told you! I told you it was going to rain down on us like no tomorrow."

"It's just a little rain, Timothy. It's not going to harm you, so take in a deep breath and breathe." Teased Dorcas as she felt two water droplets hit her warm face before they ran down her cheeks and then her neck. The sensation made her shiver before more particles of rain splashed onto her pale skin.

"It may not harm us but it shall get us both soaked through. Really Dorcas, I never understood why you loved the rain so much. Come on, the wind is picking up and we shall surely catch our death in such weather."

With a roll of her eyes and a tug on the reins Dorcas turned her horse around and kicked it on towards Timothy. "Let's go then, don't want my poor Timothy getting scared when the big bag thunder starts to sing." Yes, she was a tease but everyone thought it just added to Miss Lane's charm and character. To be a tease was a big part of Dorcas Lane's life and she loved it. With another soft kick Dorcas pushed her horse to canter off down the hill and once again laughter filled the cold air around them.

"Deary me." mumbled Timothy, his eyes watching Dorcas' body as she leant over her horse once more before she looked over her shoulder and smirked at him. Another race. "Get on, boy." His horse snorted and charged off at the highest speed possible to catch up with Dorcas. Her hair was now down her back as the rain poured down. Her dress thrashed around violently in the wind but to Timothy she looked beautiful. There was colour in her cheeks, her lips seemed rosier then normal and her chest heaved happily under all the excitement and before he knew it the both of them had charged through Candleford as people ran about to get out of the heavy rainfall.

"And I beat you once more, Timothy! You really must learn that you can never, ever beat me. It's just a fact you will have to face." Dorcas gently led her horse into the warmth of the barn before she slipped out of the saddle and landed onto the cobbled flooring beneath her. Now it seemed she was excited at the idea of going to dinner with Timothy. Deep down she knew, of course she did, that she still loved him and she always would but Timothy was married and would stay that way till Adelaide called for an end to the marriage. But, till then, she could pretend that Timothy was hers. Couldn't she?

"_**Very well, Mother. I'll stay in school and I'll pass my exams. And I'll be the best damn qualified ploughboy in England."**_


	4. Dinner By The River

Dorcas stood back from the mirror and let her brown eyes flick from her face down to her body. She never thought herself beautiful or even good looking. To her beauty didn't mean alot. People's true looks came from inside their heart and that was all that mattered to the Post Mistress. The moons glow from the open window caught in the glow on the soft yellow candle flame that caused the room to erupt in a soft light that bounced off Dorcas' pale skin. On her curvy body was a silk green dress that was laced with silver ribbons and threads. Dresses meant alot to Dorcas Lane. She loved her little luxuries and without them her life wouldn't be complete. She grew up in the thrill of a Candleford life and without it she fear that her mind might fall apart. Her soft brown curls of hair were pulled into a tight bun though a few strands had escaped down her slender neck. Tonight Timothy was to take her out for dinner and oddly enough Dorcas Lane found herself to be nervous. The floor had been paced on for nearly most day and before she knew it night had fallen and Timothy was waiting for her downstairs.

Maybe it was all a little too much. She had dressed herself up a little too richly and a large amount of her neck was showing. Dorcas Lane was a lady; no matter how much she teased or flirted her pride came first. Once again she spun around slowly and watched her reflection as her soft dress floated around her legs and her hair twisted in the small breeze she made. She stopped. She stared. "What on earth am I doing?" Even she couldn't ask that question. Dorcas didn't really know what she was doing or even why this was happening but it couldn't be that bad, she was just going out for dinner with an old friend, nothing more and nothing less. It was then that light footsteps and a knock on her door pulled her, awoke her, from her little day dream. "Yes? Come in."

In the now open door way stood Laura Timmins. She was a young girl trying to act the young woman. Her long red hair flowed down her back and in her hand was a worn, and slightly broken, brown leather book. Ah, yes, both she and Dorcas had a little passion for books, for reading. Dorcas watched Laura many times as she went out on her rounds. The girl seemed to have a spirit that couldn't be broken by man or woman and how Dorcas envied it. No matter what people thought, no matter what they said about Dorcas being a strong woman they didn't know that deep down Dorcas was nothing more than a lost soul. "Laura." Dorcas looked at the strong willed red head from over her shoulder before she spun around and flaunted off her new dress. "How does it look? I pray it isn't too much. I don't want to overdo it and make myself look the fool."

"Mrs. Lane you are speaking in the wrong." Laura now started to walk around her career and took in the patterns to the dress, each strand of lace, silk and thread before her light eyes wondered up to Dorcas' hair. "You look wonderful, as always. No doubt Sir Timothy will have the thrill of taking you out. He does seem more content then he used to be. Even before he moved to London."

It was true. All in all Timothy was relaxed and alot more at home without his wife around. Dorcas paused in thought but Laura's hands that feel onto her hair once again pulled her back into reality.

"Maybe you could put this down for tonight, Mrs. Lane?" Laura's fingers pulled out a few strands of hair from the tight bun and stood back. The Post Mistress always looked that little bit prettier when her long hair was flowing down her back. Laura thought her career a very beautiful woman and it shocked her, no matter how independent Mrs. Lane made herself out to be, that some man like Sir Timothy hadn't swept her off to some romantic location and married her without a second thought.

"Laura. It's only young ladies, such as yourself that have the right to let their luxurious, wild hair flow down their backs. We older women are meant to keep their weak, limp hair up high on their heads."

"I'm not taking no for an answer, ma'am." Laura was quick to pull the pin from Dorcas' head and soon enough nothing but curls of dark brown cascaded down Mrs. Lane's back. She seemed another person. She seemed to be young in looks and personality. "There. You look beautiful." A soft brush was gently run down Dorcas' hair till Laura stood back to look over her handy work. "Oh. Mrs. Lane. You look a picture."

Dorcas watched her reflection in the mirror for a few moments more. It was true she did look rather nice but as she said, she didn't see herself as beautiful at all. "Well, you have a gift, Laura. My hair as never looked better."

"I do try, ma'am. Now, Sir Timothy is still waiting on you."

"Oh yes! The poor man, I've left him all alone. I will go to him now." Dorcas quickly bid Laura goodnight. Her long dress whipped around her heels as she walked rapidly across the wooden flooring and then down the little staircase. Once getting to the bottom her dainty face burst into a wide smile. Timothy himself stood at the end of the staircase with a handful of pure red roses in his hand. He too was smiling, his dull eyes flicked over her body, her amazing face. He'd never seen her with her hair down before but he liked it. How he really did miss the ways and wonders of Dorcas Lane.

"Dorcas, you look like a dream."

"Why, thank you Timothy. You have Laura to thank for the hair, she is rather good at it, I must say. She is a fine girl."

"Like I said, you look a dream. And the hair just adds to that pretty face of yours, Mrs. Lane."

Dorcas rolled her eyes and took up the flowers that Timothy passed her. Her nose went to the soft petals which she smelt. The soft aroma filled her nostrils with a happy sigh. Flowers. Another weakness. "Thank you, Timothy. They are wonderful. I shall get Minnie to put them into the best vase I own."

The maid herself turned up at the mention of her name.

"Oh! Mrs. Lane. Ya look like a Princess. A Queen even!" The dizzy maid bowed down as low as she could before stumbling to one side. "I see still need to work on that I think."

"Minnie. Will you put these in the vase for me?" Dorcas quickly passed the red roses over. "Try not to break it; it's the best one I own."

"Of course, Mrs. Lane. I won't break it at all, Mrs Lane. They'll look lovely on the table. Just like you, Mrs. Lane!"

"Minnie!" Dorcas' face twisted and her soft eyes glared at the young maid. "Just go and put the roses in the vase."

"Yes, Mrs. Lane."

After the maid had run off with the roses gently cradled in her arms Dorcas sighed and looked up to Timothy. "I must apologise. She can be...a handful."

"Like I said, I find her rather amusing. She is a fun girl. Now, how about this dinner then? I know even you couldn't pass the chance for a free meal." Timothy extended his arm to her which Dorcas looped hers around. The contact between them was perfect. Dorcas' perfume that was dotted on her neck wove into the air and washed over Timothy's face. She even smelt wonderful.

**...**

The two of them walked slowly, each of them sneaking little glimpses of each other. It was a beautiful night. The moon was full and the light crept around the little town of Candleford to give it an almost eerie look. Shadows of trees could be seen as they swayed in the gentle breeze and on the branches sat night birds that sung out to the stars. How still everything seemed for the both of them.

"What a night for a lovely dinner." Timothy looked down to Dorcas who flashed him an almost childish smile. He took her through the town itself and then out on the little track that wound off to Larkrise. The Post Mistress had expected for the old squire to take her out to the Golden Lion. But no, it seemed her gentleman...her friend...had other plans up his sleeve. It was as if he was trying to impress her, not that Dorcas needed it.

"Now, Timothy." Dorcas leant her head against her friends arm as they walked slowly together down the stone covered track. "Where are you taking me? I know you, I know that look, and you're up to something."

"Can you not just trust me? Just for one night?"

"I can never be too sure, not with you around."

Timothy chuckled yet said nothing as they walked further down the lane. In the distance was a burst of light and the sound of the small river filled Dorcas' ears as it trickled over rocks and pebbles. Her eyes caught Timothy's which beamed brightly in the moon light. Now his hand had hers as he pulled her off the track and down a small hill to the river bank itself.

"Oh...Timothy."

Dorcas' hand lay over her chest as she looked at the scene before her own eyes. On the ground, by the river bank, was a blanket that had food of all types laid on it. Candles were placed into the trees and on the grassy floor. How wonderful it all looked yet Dorcas thought it a little too much. She couldn't help but think Timothy was trying just a little too hard to impress her. It seemed he forgot that he was still married to a wife and he also had a daughter, a young daughter.

"You shouldn't have done this, it's too much."

Timothy really wasn't taking no for an answer. He practically pulled Dorcas onto the blanket and grabbed a bottle of champagne that was resting in a bucket of white ice. "You, of all people, need a little treat. And me, being the gentleman I am, thought that I would be that person to give it to you." A small popping sound filled the air as the cork was pulled from the bottle before the delicious liquid inside was poured happily into two glasses.

"I guess I could do with a little papering." Dorcas sighed happily and took a glass from Timothy. "You have my thanks. It's nice to be treated, as you say, once in a while. Even the meddling Post Mistress needs a break from the trouble she causes." She sipped happily on the champagne whilst Timothy served her sandwiches and little nibbles of food.

"Mrs. Lane hardly ever causes trouble." Once again Timothy smiled as he started to eat at a sandwich. "She is the one to solve it. No wonder why so many people, rich or poor, young or old, come to her for advice and help."

"Well, maybe she likes to help." Dorcas' eyes caught Timothy's as he looked over to her with his eyebrows rose. "Just a little." The both of them looked at each other for a moment before laughter erupted between the pair. Maybe this wasn't so bad after all.

**...**

The night dragged on. It was filled with laughter, old memoires, jokes that were told badly by Timothy and the odd hand touch; though Dorcas stuck to her guns and kept in the proper manner in which she was brought up – To never touch a man if he had a ring on his finger.

"I'm afraid, Timothy, that I must retire. This Post Mistress needs to up in a few hours or her costumers will not be happy if she takes a lie in." Dorcas took the last sip of her champagne and looked over to Timothy with bright yet tired eyes.

"Yes! Of course. How silly of me not to keep track on the time." Sir Timothy looked down at the blanket and gently pulled on its threads. It had been a wonderful and deep down Timothy knew it meant something between the pair, even if Dorcas didn't see it. They sat in silence for a few minutes as the river moved gently downstream. Now Timothy was moving over the mat to Dorcas' side. They both smiled at the same time before Dorcas looked away with a girlish smile. "Dorcas?"

The Post Mistress shivered a little as her name feel from his lips. It was so calm and so soothing to her. The way he spoke put Dorcas under a spell. How she could sit there for hours and listen to anything and everything he had to say. Now her hands too played with the blanket as she looked back to him. How hard it was not to blush under his gaze. "Yes?"

Together they moved into each other. The tension was building and soon enough Dorcas was breathing a little too heavily for her own liking. His lips were inches away from hers but neither of them moved, not yet.

This was what Mrs. Lane had been dreaming for years. To have Timothy close to her no matter how wrong it was. The craving for her young man grew stronger and stronger each time she saw him with Adelaide. "You have a wife." Her words came out in a shaky whispered as her breath ran over his face.

"I have you." Timothy moved his lips onto Dorcas'. Suddenly the world around him exploded into bright colours. How he had longed for Mrs. Lane's touch. Together their lips moved it perfect time. His hand reached up and brushed over her soft cheeks.

Now she lay on the floor and Timothy was over her. Their kiss didn't break; it got stronger. Soft moans floated around in the air and the sounds of their moving lips sung in the wind. Timothy's eyes were closed but Dorcas' were wide and alert. It suddenly occurred to her that she was kissing a married man who was seemly leant over her in a way that was past friendly. This was wrong. So wrong.

"Timothy..."

"Hmm." Still he kissed her. This was too good for him to stop. He had to have Mrs. Lane, no matter what, he had to take her. He didn't take notice of her as she tried to push her head back. No, his kiss only got stronger and a little forceful. He needed her.

"Stop." By now Dorcas was whimpering into the kiss. This wasn't the Timothy she knew. He wasn't gentle, caring or understanding. His body was pushed hers a little too much and she was finding it seemly impossible to breathe in her tight corset. "Stop. Please."

"Oh Dorcas...How I've waited for you."

"No!" With all the strength she had Dorcas pushed Timothy to the floor where he landed with a crash. The magic around them crashed and burned and this time the air was filled with strained pants and gasps as the two struggled for oxygen. In a second Mrs. Lane was on her feet. She snatched up her small purse with a shallow huff. What the two of them had just done was wrong and with it brought fear to Dorcas. If this got out she would be in ruin. Kissing a married man was against Dorcas Lane. Without another word she turned and practically ran off.

"Dorcas! Dorcas wait!"

Tears stung her eyes. Her feet soon grew tired of the stone covered lane that she ran on but Dorcas wouldn't stop. Now she knew, deep down, that she was more in love with Sir Timothy than ever before but he could never be hers nor would she be his. With divorce brought shame. With marriage brought pain and Dorcas Lane would never submit herself to that.

"_**You of all people deserve more than this. You deserve more then what's left over. You deserve everything. You've held your breath long enough."**_


End file.
